(I attempted to upload photos of the day, however the blog software would not permit them to be added. Prolly because they are too beautiful)
So now that I have had a few days to process and I’m able to talk about the event... the only thing that comes to mind is, “Holy shit!” I never had a doubt in my mind that I was in love with MARE!, we have an incredible relationship and our bond was beyond amazing. Hell, when her and I met, I felt an incredible pit in my stomach, from there we would find that we had wayyyy too much in common. The same sick sense of humor, dislikes the same things, and most importantly our ability to laugh off whatever adversity came our way. I thought that I had my emotions under control.
I had a feeling that I was going to tear up. Hell I had a feeling I was going to ball, but I had no idea the amount of power one person can have over the other (“the power of love” makes so much more sense now!)
But then as I stood there in that garden with my back to the crowd. I found myself filling with joy and anxiety. I feel a tap on the shoulder and find myself crippled. I can’t move. I breathe heavy and turn to my right side. My dominant side, the side you always turn to. I look and see the most heartwarming smile and beautiful smile. Her face looking as perfect as ever and the way I’ve seen her everyday. In my opinion there is nothing worse than not recognizing your wife on your wedding day, because of the clown makeup that a self proclaimed Instagram makeup artist attempted to display as “art”. No no, she was as perfect as the day I saw her. And the dress. My god did you see that dress? She looked AMAZING!
I broke. I broke so hard. I flood of emotions hit me so hard. Similar to being hit by a brick. We both wiped one another’s tears as our families and bridal party looked on. Cameramen capturing the entire moment (which will cause another flood of emotion once those get sent to us).
Allow me to backtrack, this was all after I split my pants while attempted to climb into the rescue truck that was transporting us to the wedding. Huge shout out to the manager Fred, who took care of me. He quickly told me to drop my pants. This provided a bonding moment between my groomsmen, my father, and my father in law as I stood in a small suite, dressed to the nines from the waist up. Once patched up, I stepped outside to the 2nd happiest moment of my life.
Let us jump back to the events of the day... from that moment we took photos upon photos upon photos. We captured some of the most gorgeous, breathtaking, and beautiful views West Paterson NJ, had to offer. However, none of that matters. I only saw one thing. Her.
As we prepared to see her walk down the aisle. I once again thought I had it together (Wrong). The groomsmen took a few swigs from a half drunken bottle of champagne, we cheered to the future, to Health, and happiness. As a nice jab at my job as a fire inspector, we all hit the exit sign above the door. Think similar to the fighting Irish slapping the “play like a champion today” sign on the field approach from the locker room. We smacked that sign for happiness and good luck. We smacked it as a bond of friends. We all went to our respective spots on the dance floor. We all stood in deep anticipation. Which was funny because the entire bridal party had been taking photos for several hours before that.
I quickly look around the room and I’m immediately overcome with happiness. All of these amazing people that have had such a positive impact on our lives, all in one place, at one time! The thought of this and the fact that It will more than likely never happen again was a tough feeling to swallow over the last few days. I have been having quick little episodes of feeling that have been reducing me to tears. I snap back to reality as I hear the opening to the bridesmaids entrance song. (If you’d like to relive the moment, the song was ‘Falling slowly’ covered by the vitamin string quartet. The song has been covered many times but it is from the motion picture and musical “Once”. I was a fan of the movie and MARE! Surprised me with tickets to see it on broadway before they ended their run.)
The first few notes of the song mixed with the beauty of the bridesmaids walking through the door was too much. I was doing okay, until my sister and Ashley both told me not to cry as they walked down the aisle. At that point, I lost it in anticipation of knowing what was about to come. As the song changed to the bridal entrance, I broke again. My best man behind me hand on my back. It was an amazing moment of friendship between him and I. The picture still humbled me out and is a moment I will cherish forever. From there I hear other groomsman getting choked up. The room getting choked up. Everyone was choked up. As her father handed of his daughter. The flood came back again.
As I helped her step onto the altar, my brain realized there was nobody else in that room but her. Hell for the rest of the night there was nobody in that room. The ceremony was absolutely perfect.
Once it was able to start because I couldn’t control myself. Damn leaky eyes. Our vows were exchanged in a sentimental yet comical way as I flipped through my notebook to find my vows. The rings were exchanged. As the reverend started to announce, “Now by the power vested in me...”, I couldn’t help but let out a huge ear to ear smile with a firm grip on my now wife’s hands. I didn’t hear anything else but, “you may now kiss the bride”. At that time we shared the most passionate kiss in the history of our time together. Again, I was overcome. The amount of love and happiness in that room is something I can’t put into words. Euphoric? Magical? Wonderful? I’m yet to find a way to pin point it.
The cocktail hour was filled with happy people sharing drinks and food. As they all came and congratulated us. I felt terrible I was able to speak to everyone there. Time was moving very very fast. Before we knew it, the cocktail hour was over, and the part was on.
Our DJ, Dave Mondo, absolutely killed it. I can’t say enough about his craft. I threw out some ideas and let the artist do his work. The dance floor was packed for the entire night. Hell the guy packed the floor just by playing “this is how we do it”. It was game on from there. The rest of the night flew by at light speed. The alcohol helped by greasing the rails for that to happen. The next morning I woke up piecing back together the events as if it was a scene from ‘Weekend at Bernie’s.’
The following days I found myself in a state of disbelief. Not to be cliche, but it felt like “It was all a Dream”. The following two days I just continued to cry every time I realized that there were so many people who loved and support us with us that night. I also tear up knowing that I am the most lucky man in the world. I imagine that this is kind of like winning the lottery, but better. It was that night that I realized that there are a lot more people who have my back than I had imagined. It’s an amazing sensation that has had a tremendous impact on me. At that time it made me want to be an even better man.
As I write this, I am sitting on the plane en route to my honeymoon destination in Aruba. As we speak, every time I glance at my wife, a tear comes to my eye. I assume that one day, it will stop. But at the same time, I don’t want to. I don’t ever want to lose that sensation about someone. I never want to lose that love, and I never want to leave her side.
